Enjoying Life With a Child's Abandon

When was the last time you enjoyed life from a child’s perspective? Enjoying every moment, not wanting it to end…tumbling through the day with wild abandon…meeting new friends without forsaking the old. I love hanging out with my nephews. They are extremely competitive with each other and they love each other fiercely. This spring, we went to Centennial Olympic Park and they ran into the water rings as if they were on the beach. They were not ashamed of what they had on. They did not care who was looking at them or if their thighs were too big or butt was too wide. I cannot remember the last time I enjoyed a day without thinking about what time it was or where I needed to be next. I remember as a child running outside and playing with my cousins and friends all day. Using a jar to catch fireflies, picking blackberries and plums, riding bikes, taking walks, making mud pies and so many other things that filled my day with joy. I want to take a day and just play like a child. What would I do if I could take just one day and not care about all the things that adults think about…….
• I would spend a whole day at the beach running in and out of the surf. I would play volley ball and build sandcastles. I would walk the beach and pick up shells and chase the birds and the sea crabs. I would enjoy the sun as it warmed my body and bury my friends in the sand.
• I would go to a playground and swing on a swing as high as I could. Slide down the sliding board and turn myself upside down on the monkey bars. I would play tag and hide & seek with my friends.
• I would eat peaches, watermelon, plums and blackberries until their juices ran all down my face. I would devour snow cones, popsicles and homemade strawberry ice cream until it ran down my arm.
• I would ride my bicycle with my hand up in the air. I would play kickball, hopscotch and ring around the rosy until the street light came on.
A day of enjoying with a child’s abandon….still believing I could do anything and still being willing to try to accomplish every goal before talking myself out of pursuing it. So what do you think….what would you do if you could take a day and just play like a child. What do you think about living life without any restrictions….like a child waiting on the day to begin? So, what do you think?

Nothing to Fear but Fear Itself

As a child, I wasn’t afraid of anything…well mice if there were in the house uninvited. Even now things like snakes, gerbils, spiders don’t frighten me. As an adult the things you fear as a child are definitely not the same. As an adult my fears have nothing to do with lions and tigers and bears….my fears can and have held me back from achieving or even pursuing my dreams. Like most, I surround myself with life affirming scriptures (Psalms 91 is one of my favorites), but even with encouragement from scriptures and friends the fear monster still appears. So now that I am facing one of my fears (sharing my writing), I need to really face all of the others. Here are a few:
• Fear of failure-This one should be off my list by now because for the past 3 years I feel like I have lived in the river of failure. After losing my job and not being able to find comparable employment it feels as if this fear has come manifested itself in my life. I know people face failure every day. But I truly believe you learn more from you failures than you successes.
• Fear of success-I know I sound crazy, but with success comes responsibility to keep the success going. Intertwined in being successful is also the risk of not being successful…not so much failing but being average.
• Fear of not being needed-This is something I need to really run from because sometimes, well most times, I am too helpful. Rejection is hard to face. I am naturally a helpful person. I truly enjoy the feeling of being needed almost to my detriment.
• Fear of never being loved-Everyone deserves to have love in their lives and everyone hopes to find that one true love. Well at 46, sometimes I feel like my hope is fading. Like most women, I would love to be in a committed loving relationship with a man, but sometimes this dream seems to have passed me by.
These are just a few of my fears. I am sure these are common fears for most people. Internal fears eat away at you like mice nibbling on cheese. They can sometimes stop you from even trying to conquer them. But I do believe that God does command his angels concerning me and that he will guard me in all my ways. In God, there is no fear. Fear is a tool of satan who tries to stop me from being my very best and being in God’s will for my life. This is a big thing for me. Knowing and understanding that in God there is no failure, in God there is no fear. I cling to this fact everyday of my life. So what do you think? Are your fears paralyzing your dreams and faith in God? Are your fears stopping you from achieving your goals? Are your fears more prominent in your life than your dreams and goals? How do you overcome your fears? Really….What do you think?

Why Am I Blogging

I have always been told I was a good writer, but I have also always been shy about letting others read my writing. So, in some ways this “blog” thing is a way of facing my fear. Like most people, I don’t really like rejection, especially when I am putting my heart out there for people to dissect into tiny pieces. In my head, I hear the comments…has she lost her mind…WTF is she talking about…why is she blogging about this. But today I told a friend I was thinking about starting a blog…he said blogs can be refreshing and therapeutic. So, here is the start of something new for me. I don’t know what all I will blog about or even how often I will blog. But know that what I blog about will delve into who I am as a person and will also probably be the cheapest therapy I can get. I have come to the realization that sometimes just putting my feelings, fears, weaknesses, dreams and stuff out there kinda frees me from holding it in. I hold in so much. Probably because I grew up in a household where the mantra was don’t go telling people our business…I think I took it too literally. So, if you decide to read what I write and want to comment, great…it will only help me with my internal therapy sessions. If you get something from it or if you are motivated to try something new I will cheer you on. If you don’t like what I write that is ok too. We can all agree to disagree and to be frankly honest with you, you really don’t have to read anything I write…but I hope you will. I also hope you will comment and let me know your thoughts. Maybe this won’t just be my own personal there therapy session.